Guide How To Become A Pac-Main

[Splebel]

I totally want this to be the de facto thing people use when they ask what it's like to main Pac-Man.

Read more about this guide...

 

[LinkoHakurei]

Hello Splebel the pleb, i am your usual smash boards user with so many mains i could even beat Zero blindfolded! I recently picked up pacman and had the opportunity to experience true hell since the first opponent i was able to practice pacman with was a sheik and ness player. I played so many games and won some against his sheik but he then abandoned his soul and threw his brain out the window to achieve his final form NESS! After that what i though to be hell actually turned out to be the shadow realm!

I have since been considering to go down "The Dark Path" since i really can't find a way to win with pacman when the only person i have to practice with has sold his soul to the dark lord in order to win. It has become an endless struggle of pain and suffering to main pacman and for that the best course of actions would be to abandon him now and move on in life.

If there is anything that would inspire me to get better i would appreciate it but for now my future is looking grim...

Rest in pepperoni my boii you will be missed ayy lmao!

 

[Splebel]

To LinkoHakurei The Wavering,

It is unfortunate that you are considering to go down "The Dark Path" as it is a one way trip. Because you can "even beat Zero Blindfolded" I will bestow upon my vast wisdom of dealing with Ness players just for you so anyone else reading this look away right now until you too can beat Zero blindfolded. Just follow these 3 easy steps:

Spoiler: Don't open if not worthy. You know who you are.

Step 1: Distract the Ness player by asking the Ness player "What's that behind you."
Step 2: Unplug the player's controller.
Step 3: When Ness player figures it out, deny any involvement and proceed to win.

Now the problem with the above is it requires you to be in the same room as them. What about online? Follow these steps:

Spoiler: Don't open this either if you aren't worthy.

Step 1: Shut down your Internet.
Step 2: When the Ness player asks what happened say your Internet isn't very good and you can't play anymore.
Step 3: Keep doing that until they quit picking Ness.

Hopefully that will help against your struggles against Ness. I went from losing some games against Ness to never losing a game against Ness.

However because your friend has abandoned their soul none of this will work because this only works on normal people. But fear not because your friend is a Vampire and I have a quick and easy solution to this common problem among high-level smashers.

Spoiler: Don't open unless your friend is a soulless Vampire

Step 1: Bath in garlic
Step 2: Wash your clothes in garlic
Step 3: Wear garlic around your neck
Step 4: Eat garlic for lunch
Step 5: Start a match with your friend
Step 6: Go over to your friend and ask him if he feels uncomfortable yet. If he says no, get closer until he says yes.
Step 7: Banish him to whence he came.
Step 8: Finish the match and win.

If your friend is fighting you over the Internet then this won't work and you will need to meet him in person.

I hope with this Information you can continue along your path the becoming a true Pac-Main.

Sincerely,
Splebel

 

[LinkoHakurei]

To Splebel the Inspiration,

I have read through your suggestions and i gotta say they are very informative and helpful, I am exited to try this out next time i go down to my friend's house. My main role will be to exorcise him from that evil vampire, i will bring a lot of garlic and also tell my local priest to accompany me to rid this man's soul of the evil vampire in the name of Jesus! I will then proceed to show my dominance as the alpha pac-main by beating him blindfolded and get Zero to spectate me on skype while i beat him!

The humiliation will be so much that he will have no other option but to give up his vampire powers, go find his brain back and stop playing Ness forever! I will update on the situation when i get the opportunity but for now i need to make preparations.

Thank you!

Sincerely,
The Exorcist

 

[Splebel]

Splebel updated How To Become A Pac-Main with a new update entry:

Added the part of the guide of how to become a Pac-Main

After looking at all the rather poor reviews I was receiving I did some reflection on the guide and realized it was missing something. That was "How to Become a Pac-Main." It was the whole point of the guide and I forgot it. I think I was too enlightened, but now that I'm grounded I have updated the guide on how to become a Pac-Main. Hopefully this will help those of you who thought this guide wasn't very good.