Detecting Johns: A Guide

[The Sauce Boss]

"Frigate Orpheon made me die." Explanation.

"Frigate Orpheon made me die." John.

10wuts.

I see what you are going for, but this is how I would explain it.

Frigate doesn't MAKE anyone do anything. You died because you are bad on the stage and therefore bad at brawl. It still isn't accepting the reality that you control the game, not vice versa. That statement puts the responsibility on the stage and not the player.

If frigate had unavoidable stage hazards it actually could make you die. But it doesn't.

 

[Veng]

I main MK for 3 reasons

40% because people always john about mk, and because hes "so cheap"
40% because hes the best character
20% because hes a bad ***

 

[fromundaman]

If frigate had unavoidable stage hazards it actually could make you die. But it doesn't.

Ummm... It can star KO you when it flips... Granted, it's rare, and it's partially the player's fault, but it can happen.

 

[DtJ XeroXen]

I like, never john, I'm too polite.

I literally had my controller's C-stick break out on me in the middle of a tournament match, and I said NOTHING. At the end, I just said "Good Game." and proceeded to fix the controller.

 

[ndayday]

I think it would be perfectly acceptable to say something about that. I know I would.

By the way, how did it...break?

 

[The Sauce Boss]

Ummm... It can star KO you when it flips... Granted, it's rare, and it's partially the player's fault, but it can happen.

It makes noises before it does which is plenty a fair warning, so it would be player fault. I said unavoidable stage hazard, meaning like a bomb flies in without warning.

I like, never john, I'm too polite.

I literally had my controller's C-stick break out on me in the middle of a tournament match, and I said NOTHING. At the end, I just said "Good Game." and proceeded to fix the controller.

Why didn't you ask to pause?

 

[fromundaman]

It makes noises before it does which is plenty a fair warning, so it would be player fault. I said unavoidable stage hazard, meaning like a bomb flies in without warning.

True, but what stage DOES have unavoidable stage hazards?
Everything on every stage is avoidable to some extent, though yeah, that would still be the player's fault. I'm just saying though, FO can in fact kill you, and it's not always easy to avoid (IE: What do you do as a character with a ****-tastic recovery and the stage flips on you, putting you below the stage?).

Basically, the reasoning is valid, so I dunno, I guess the context would kind of determine if it's a john or not...

 

[The Sauce Boss]

It is definitely still a john. The context just deems its absurdity.

And you bring up a good point. Hardly any stages have unavoidable hazards. The only real argument about stage fairness is about tripping and then getting hit with a hazard, which I have always held as the real reason stage hazards are unfair. (think tripping into the halberd claw). But you can not trip into FO's star KO

 

[Da-D-Mon-109]

People seem to like this thread... Am I John if I say if I hadn't made (specific mistake here that cost me the win) that bad move, but admit it was my fault for not being able to see that move coming and react properly?

 

[Veril]

People seem to like this thread... Am I John if I say if I hadn't made (specific mistake here that cost me the win) that bad move, but admit it was my fault for not being able to see that move coming and react properly?

Saying you would have won a match if it weren't for a mistake you made is insulting to the other player and reduces the significance of their win. The fact that you admit it was your fault doesn't help. Why? You are giving yourself credit for their win. Lame.

 

[Da-D-Mon-109]

But what if If proven after the match, under the exact same conditions, that it was my own slip up that cost me the match, and that without making that 1 mistake, mirroring the rest of the match exactly (his moves were that predictable that it was done successfully), that I can still win?

 

[DtJ Hilt]

People don't seem to get the difference between an "excuse" and an "explanation". I can explain to you how gravity works, but that doesn't mean I'm excusing your mother for dropping you on your head as a child.

too good xD

sigged

 

[JCav]

can someone tell me why johns affect my play?

i mean i know that they are coming (esp around my crew) and they get in my head and make me play worse. i know how dumb they are but why do they affect me?


could i get some psychology on this one?

 

[DtJ Hilt]

not sure about messing you up during the game... but johning WILL make it difficult for you to get better, as you are ignoring the reasons you are losing.

 

[JCav]

not sure about messing you up during the game... but johning WILL make it difficult for you to get better, as you are ignoring the reasons you are losing.

i think i worded that poorly, my apologies. but normal people who ive never met before bother me when they john. its just my one friend who i probably play more than anyone else has come up with the most ridiculous johns before. i feel like he has the same mindset as i did when i first got brawl. hes actually pissed me off soo much sometimes that i started screaming at him and things got really ugly. basically, i think their all dumb...

 

[NeoCrono]

I have used a "I didn't like the stage song" john before as a joke, it was soooo funny

 

[A New England Winter]

"I could've won if you didn't win, making me not win and making you win, which means I didn't win, and if I did you wouldn't won, and only I would've won."

 

[Thirtyfour]

Fav'd------------

 

[SothE700k]

"I could've won if you didn't win, making me not win and making you win, which means I didn't win, and if I did you wouldn't won, and only I would've won."

A winrar iz u!!

 

[The Milk Monster]

I'll john on accident, but if I consciously know the person is worse then me, but I will always follow whatever john with a good game, or I want a rematch or something honorable.
And I'll jokingly john against like Legan and Thinkaman and such.
But you can't really john against them because they have like an instant no john shield, since they main Link and Jiggz.

 

[The Sauce Boss]

i think i worded that poorly, my apologies. but normal people who ive never met before bother me when they john.

I think everyone gets annoyed when people john. You say that like it is weird? You just have to ignore them, or pwn them with a witty thread like this .

You probably play worse just because you lose concentration or get frustrated at the johner. It sounds simple, but that kind of thing can really throw you off.

 

[t3h n00b]

I'll john on accident, but if I consciously know the person is worse then me, but I will always follow whatever john with a good game, or I want a rematch or something honorable.
And I'll jokingly john against like Legan and Thinkaman and such.
But you can't really john against them because they have like an instant no john shield, since they main Link and Jiggz.

I john all the time if I lose to Falcons. I mean the character is broken. So much priority, range, and manliness should not exist in one character.

 

[mzink*]

It's funny how some people aren't familiar with the concept of No Johns. Every little thing they are giving some excuse, not knowing how unnecessary and irritating it can be lol. Ok I get it, you should've reacted to that situation better, no need to compulsively explain yourself to me. Just accept what happened and move on to the next match.

I think the john I've used before is "Psh whatever I need to get warmed up."

 

[Kinzer]

Best first post/thread.

EVAR!

 

[Browny]

cold hand johns are legit

Try playing something like guitar hero with cold hands... johns dont only exist in smash bros lol

 

[DtJ Hilt]

cold hand johns are legit

Try playing something like guitar hero with cold hands... johns dont only exist in smash bros lol

http://www.smashboards.com/showpost.php?p=6423896&postcount=214
rarely is there something that you cant prevent one way or another. Not taking the steps to prevent it is your own fault.

 

[t3h n00b]

It's fun to play Halo with cold hands, but it doesn't help your self-esteem

 

[Tennet]

What if they say:
"If only I had played smarter I could have won."

 

[wh1te5had0w]

But it is fun watching your opponent John for like 5 mins after the match it feels like you have accomplished something

 

[The Milk Monster]

cold hand johns are legit

Try playing something like guitar hero with cold hands... johns dont only exist in smash bros lol

Cold hand johns are 100% legit.
It sucks.
Especially playing Melee with cold hands, **** ain't happening.

And in response to t3h n00b, johning against Captain Falcon is legit too, unless you picked the only match up in his favor(Falcon ditto's.) Then it's no johns allowed.

 

[cajunkid]

my friend is name john, i detect 2 johns in my town.

 

[Veng]

I found a John http://www.smashboards.com/showthread.php?t=222476

But it is fun watching your opponent John for like 5 mins after the match it feels like you have accomplished something

Yea it does, its also slightly embarrassing that the person you just played cant accept it.

 

[Tennet]

Johns are FTL but can be lol.

 

[sMexy-Blu]

I could have won if we were playing a better game.

Spoiler

Melee

 

[❀W.E.M.P.❀]

awesome thread, you did a reallty good job on this subject :3

 

[t3h n00b]

Cold hand johns are 100% legit.
It sucks.
Especially playing Melee with cold hands, **** ain't happening.

And in response to t3h n00b, johning against Captain Falcon is legit too, unless you picked the only match up in his favor(Falcon ditto's.) Then it's no johns allowed.

Don't even get me started with how hard it is to beat him with MK

Spoiler

10falconjohns

 

[Barge]

Lol, okay. I can understand cold hands can greatly affect your play. But seriously, complaining about it wont do anything. It's best to keep it to yourself.

 

[wangston]

Johns make the world go round. With out johns there is no competitive smash.

 

[DtJ Hilt]

Cold hand johns are 100% legit.
It sucks.
Especially playing Melee with cold hands, **** ain't happening.

i could have beat him if i didnt have cold hands.
i could have beat him if i took care of a problem before the match started.

seriously. cold hand johns are no different than "tired" johns. or "hungry" johns. If your hands would be cold during a match, they'd likely be cold before the match as well.

Notice the problem. take care of it. If you dont, it's your own fault. Denying that you would be at fault for it is stupid.

 

[Zylar]

Good stuff.
Some people are just too proud to say humble things like GOOD GAME, even when they lose, or nice *enter character here*, or I need to improve, etc...
Also, annoying and spam johns are to good, lol.
*I lost because you spammed soandso* XD
*That move soandso is so annoying, I could have won if you stopped hitting me with it." (^^' )